stories..

We all have our own stories to tell. Stories of happiness, sadness, love, hate, anger, despair... I remember times when I sat down at roadside cafes, watching the world go by. And I wonder what lies beneath each and every single person who walked down that road that day, who walked into my view. The man who stood at the traffic light looking impatiently at his watch, waiting to cross; the girl biting into a sandwich as she strolled on, stopping as she picked up a call; the young couple laughing as they walked past; the Caucasian man looking puzzled as he stared at the map... I wonder what their stories are, I wonder what they have to tell.

I have my own stories, my own secrets. I'm not ready to share, because words fail me. But if I bare my soul to you, will you listen?

It's ironic how, as someone with prior experience doing marketing and public relations supposedly good with words, it is always difficult for me to put into words about my feelings and what I want. In a way, I never wanted to share how I really feel or what I really want because I don't want to feel too exposed, nor do I want to make someone feel obliged into doing something or changing to suit my likes and expectations. But sharing is a two-way thing... something which I stopped doing since.. a long while ago. And I doubt I'll be doing it again anytime soon.

So. What's your story?

*****

As weird as it sounds, I love the smell of cigarettes in aircon. Probably because it reminds me of my childhood, when Dad used to smoke chimneys. The bedroom always smelt of cigarettes, always smelt of Dad. I've gotten into the habit of lighting up a ciggie whenever I am overseas and let the smell infiltrate into the hotel room (and of course, I do it only if I'm allocated a smoking room), and it just makes me feel a lot at home.

*****

I wonder why when we cry, there's always an aching feeling in the chest. At a time when most people I know are sleeping, I am still wide awake. My tears have dried up and I guess it's time to move on. So long as the people I care for are happy, nothing else kinda matters.

xoxo,
jwnn