back from karachi.

a freaking long stay in karachi got me hooked onto alias and refusing to step out of the room for dinner just because i wanted to watch alias.

but this trip was a good one, with good people who eventually turned out as friends, and we spent hours on the phone just chatting, even though we were just a couple of doors away.

and Murakami's "Sputnik Sweetheart" got me thinking when i read the last few pages:

"So that's how we live our lives. No matter how deep and fatal the loss, no matter how important the thing that's stolen from us - that's snatched right out of our hands - the outer layer of skin from before, we continue to play out our lives this way, in silence. We draw ever nearer to our allotted span of time, bidding it farewell as it trails off behind, leaving behind a feeling of immeasurable emptiness."

"Maybe, in some distant place, everything is already, quietly, lost. Or at least there exists a silent place where everything can disappear, welding together in a single, overlapping figure. And as we live our lives we discover - drawing towards us the thin threads attached to each - what as many beautiful lost things as I could. Drawing them closer, holding on to them. Knowing all the while that their lives are fleeting."

so true.

these few days, i can't really differentiate between dreams and real life. some nights, i wake up in tears, and then i wonder, for a long while, if the dreams were real. then i get scared and confused, to the extent i'd call and check if it really happened.

ah wells.

today is father's day. think last year we had a chance to be at home and dine together at dinner, but this year, this year, well... i haven't even heard from him, apart from the fact that he's switched hospitals and is still in ICU.

oh well. just glad to have people around me who were able to cheer me up the past few days, even though we briefly know one another.

k gotta zzz.