i am grateful...

... for people who love me as I am, fats and all.

Sometimes you don't realise it.. but words do hurt.

So this month is a good month for people to get married, give birth... To date, I've already got 3 bombs sitting on my desks. I wonder how it feels like to just take the plunge and then get hitched. That means you are stuck with that person for the rest of your life! Makes me wonder if I'll ever be ready to settle down with one special person. But it's too early to tell, I'm not thinking that way yet.

Time flies really fast. In a twinkling of an eye, it's already been one year into my current job. I wonder if I have changed much from the person I was before, and I wonder how life would be if I hadn't taken this path.

Had a brief chat online with Long-ge, and we talked about how we let time push the distance between us. Sometimes you just want to pick up the phone and call someone to just.. ask after him, but then you don't know where to start, or whether you can pick up from where you left off. And it becomes harder to update each other on our lives... and so we just deal with the same old answers when we're asked after.

Wouldn't it be great if .... there are patches for us to download so that we can update on one another's lives?

Couple of flights back, I met this Canadian couple who have been staying in Penang for quite a while. We chatted about how technology and the advances in transportation have made the world a lot smaller, and he told me about the ironies in all these. How he was uncontactable from the rest of the world due to the lack of internet in certain countries, and when he finally did get hold of a computer, he found that his mother had passed on. And when he wanted to book tickets over the phone, he was notified, by a recorded message no less, that the 24-hour phone service had been changed to being operated during office hours. So he went online to book, and found that the website was down due to heavy traffic. A tool created to convenience us, to shorten the time taken in the past, probably isn't such a good thing after all.

So why do we find it difficult to pick up the phone, even if you can't manage the courage to call, to draft out an sms to ask after someone? In this era where everyone, from young kids to even my grandma, owns a mobile, technology still fails to pull us closer to one another.

*****

We all seek to be accepted.... I may not be your perfect choice, but I probably will try to be as perfect as I can. I just want to find someone who can love this imperfect me in the most perfect way possible.

Is that difficult?